Posts Tagged ‘Weekend’

Jack Black, Shirley MacLaine Join Bernie

August 7th, 2010 by lawwebbhh651109j87hN5gxp2l | Comments Off | Filed in Movie

Jack Black will again act for his School of Rock director in Richard Linklater’s upcoming Bernie , says The Hollywood Reporter .

The film, based on the true story of Berhardt “Bernie” Tiede, features Black as a mortician who becomes companion to an 81 year old widow, Marjorie Nugent (to be played by Shirley MacLaine). Tiede was convicted of shooting Nugent in 1996 and hiding her body in a freezer for nine months, pretending as though she was still alive (ironically, the similarly-titled Weekend at Bernie’s used a similar plot to comedic effect just a few years before the crime occurred).

Bernie begins production this October in Carthage, Texas, the same location as the original murder.

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Jonah Hex Review

June 18th, 2010 by lawwebbhh651109j87hN5gxp2l | Comments Off | Filed in Movie

Josh Brolin in Jonah Hex movie review

Screen Rant’s Paul Young Reviews Jonah Hex

I didn’t set my hopes very high walking into the theater to watch Jonah Hex. I knew it was based on a DC comic book character and that was the extent of my knowledge on the subject. I was a clean slate, my mind a lump of unformed clay just waiting for director Jimmy Hayward (Horton Hears a Who!) to wrap his hands around it like a scene from Ghost, molding it into something exciting and entertaining.

Well Hayward is no Swayze, because I’m sad to say that Jonah Hex is NOT going to be the surprise hit of the summer.  The film’s story and pacing clods along like a horse who’s thrown a shoe, unbeknownst to the rider.

The pacing issues are largely due to the scatter-brained writing style of Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor, or as they are known in the credits “Neveldine & Taylor.” Jonah Hex very much follows the fast-paced and hectic styling that N&T have established in their previous works, Crank, Crank: High Voltage and Gamer.

The story of Jonah Hex opens on the main character, played by Josh Brolin, doing a voice over as a group of Confederate soldiers unleash mayhem upon a bunch of unsuspecting Union soldiers. Hex talks about how he was bred for war, how war is in his blood and war is what he is good at. Then there are some jumbled cut shots of a different outfit of Confederate soldiers being captured by the Union Army for reasons that won’t be fully explained until 45 minutes into the film. The audience is just supposed to “go with it” I suppose.

jonah hex john malkovich reviews

The opening credits are actually very entertaining and are, in my opinion, the best part of the movie. Hayward has used a modified version of cell shading animation to tell the entire story of who Jonah Hex is in a short 5 minute animated clip. Jonah Hex (as he is called throughout the entire film because no one ever calls him just Jonah – EVER!)  has made an enemy in his former commander Quentin Turnbull, played by the once-great John Malkovich, who’s performance here is only slightly better than Megan Fox’s.

Jonah Hex killed Turnbull’s son and betrayed his unit – so, in an act of retaliation, Turnbull’s burns Hex’s wife and son alive forcing him to watch them die. Then, just to “rub it in,” he scars Hex with a branding iron. But that’s not how Jonah Hex gets that beautiful face we’ve all seen in the trailers. That part comes later.

Jonah Hex reviews

So far, even though a couple of minor plot points are hazy, the story is fairly simple and easy to follow – it’s man versus man, mano a mano, the anti-hero pitted against the villain that did him wrong. I get that, and if the writers would have left it to that, the movie probably would be much better. Instead, Turnbull leaves his freshly scarred conquest hanging on an X from which, of course, he survives with help from the Crow Indians. As Jonah Hex explains, he didn’t become immortal, but was close enough to being dead that he can now speak with the dead.

Jonah Hex turns to vigilantism after the supposed death of his archenemies and winds up on the wrong side of the law. However there is one problem: turns out Turnbull was just faking death and has plans to blow up the entire Unites States Union. Um…OK. He wants to do it using a weapon that was invented by…wait for it…Eli Whitney. That’s right, the inventor of the cotton gin apparently was a military weapons genius and designed but never built a super-mega-kill-everything-Gatling cannon.

President Ulysses S. Grant thinks the only person capable of catching and stopping Turnbull is Jonah Hex and soon sets him out on the task. The hunt for Turnbull and his rowdy band of rabble rousers begins and quickly ends 5 minutes later after Jonah Hex talks to a fresh corpse. Along the way Jonah Hex joins up with his favorite prostitute, Lilah (Megan Fox), who gets mixed up in things when Turnbull’s right hand man, Burke, kidnaps her.

jonah hex review megan fox

The rest of the film is all loud, chaotic action that makes little to no sense and includes a wealthy Southern gentleman traitor, a black general store owner that builds “high tech” weapons that only get used once, some sort of demon albino cage fighter named “Snake” and what can only be described as a case of Dragonballs. And you get to enjoy all of this action and nonsense to poorly written and executed power rock music. Because, you know, that’s how it was back then…

What worked in Jonah Hex? Josh Brolin’s performance is actually pretty good and there are some scattered moments of humor that work (I liked the bit about the horse’s name) and a couple of the fight scenes are enjoyable.

What didn’t work in Jonah Hex? Megan Fox and John Malkovich’s performances are just plain bad and neither one of them can hold a “Southern” accent. All of these characters live in Georgia and all the actors playing them can do is say “Ya’ll” a few times. It doesn’t help that most of the corny one-liners we hear in the trailer are delivered like they are corny one-liners in the film.

jonah hex reviews

I can believe a lot when it comes to movies. I can believe that Eli Whitney was a weapons genius, that a giant cannon that will obliterate everything in its path could be built in the late 1800’s and a crow flying out of a man’s mouth during an Indian medicine ritual but I draw the line in the believability sand when Megan Fox turns into a iron slinging Super whore.

Fortunately for moviegoers, Toy Story 3 opens this weekend as well and if Warner Bros. is very lucky, most people will forget that Jonah Hex was even in theaters.


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The 10 Best Movie Threequels of All Time

June 18th, 2010 by lawwebbhh651109j87hN5gxp2l | Comments Off | Filed in Movie

Best Threequel Movies Of All Time

This weekend marks the release of Toy Story 3, which is already getting rave reviews as a brilliant third installment to a near-flawless franchise. But when you look back at the handful of threequels in movie history, the memories are not quite as bright.

From Batman Forever to Spider-Man 3, there are far more awful third installments of beloved movie franchises than great ones. So, in honor of the hard work from the good folks at Disney/Pixar, we are going in a different direction… Rather than relish in the horrendous examples of failed threequels, we are going to present our 10 favorite third installments of popular franchises.

Some examples are part of a grand saga, while others are the closing chapter of an unforgettable tale. Either way, they won over our hearts and left us smiling.

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10. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

When Alfonso Cuarón took the reigns of the Harry Potter franchise, everything got a little brighter by getting a lot darker. The tone of the film was what many movie fans hoped for, but maybe the child stars just needed a chance to grow into the roles.

Cuarón set the tone for the rest of the franchise, which begins its final chapter this winter. The Dementors are a staple of Azkaban that remain a favorite of many. But the addition of Gary Oldman as Sirius Black was the move that assured this film a spot amongst our favorites.

9. Goldfinger

James Bond Goldfinger

There have been 22 James Bond films, but only one can truly call itself a threequel. It is difficult to find a favorite amongst the classic renditions of the sleek spy. Even some of the more recent films have taken spots near the top of fans’ lists. But Goldfinger became a kind of revolution. It broke boundaries and tested audiences, all the while giving them the spy they wanted.

One of the main reasons for the enduring love for Goldfinger is the henchman known as Oddjob. Featured in our Most Awesome Weapons list, the bladed hat he used to chop the head off a statue became an icon within the film.

Even more memorable is Jill Masterson’s gold-covered body. Shirley Eaton, the actress portraying Masterson, was even featured on the cover of LIFE Magazine in a photographed reprisal of the scene. And let’s not forget Ms. “Pussy Galore.”

On top of it all, Goldfinger laid the ground work for Austin Powers in Goldmember. Unfortunately, that was not as enjoyable a threequel as its the film it spoofed.

8. Die Hard: With a Vengeance

Die Hard With A Vengeance Bruce Willis Samuel L. Jackson

New York City has never seen an action film quite like Die Hard: With a Vengeance. It perfectly blended the comedy, thriller and action genres into one cohesive movie. Ultimately, Samuel L. Jackson’s presence alongside the always great Bruce Willis brought a dynamic duo that gave tremendous flow to the film.

While Alan Rickman’s Hans Gruber is one of cinema’s best villains, Jeremy Irons brilliantly portrays his brother, Simon. The cat-and-mouse games, Simon Says jokes and Advil gag make Vengeance one of our favorite threequels of all time.

7. Mission: Impossible III

Mission Impossible III Tom Cruise

Many fans consider John Woo’s Mission: Impossible II to be a minor slip-up after the intelligent and exciting first film. Others love Woo’s escapist action, which used slow motion and a lot of Doves to say that Ethan Hunt can do just about anything. All things considered, J.J. Abrams’ third installment could easily be considered the best of all three.

Abrams truly brought his creativity to the trilogy with a mysterious villain, a deadly weapon and a romantic edge that never felt hokey. On top of it all, Tom Cruise brought his believable performance from the first film back for this threequel.

6. Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi

Star Wars Episode VI Return of the Jedi

First of all, Return of the Jedi is the third best of the original Star Wars trilogy – let me put that out there right now. But the least favorite of one of the most cherished trilogies of all time is not exactly the worst label. So, here we are at #5 with Return of the Jedi.

So much is resolved in the final chapter of the Star Wars saga that it becomes a legacy of its own. The epic saber-to-saber combat between Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader is a near-perfect finale. And just when you thought Vader’s paternal revelation in The Empire Strikes Back was the twist of all twists, Lucas gives Vader a glorious and honorable death.

Return of the Jedi struggles only because its predecessors are so great. A New Hope and The Empire Strikes Back are a pair of films that are almost impossible to top. But the third installment was created as a closing chapter of the saga, and in doing so it was a success – even with the Ewoks.

Continue to our top 5 threequels…

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Upcoming Movie Release Dates Announced

May 20th, 2010 by lawwebbhh651109j87hN5gxp2l | Comments Off | Filed in Movie

Coming Soon Movie Release Dates

Several studios have announced a number of official release dates for in-development films set to debut over the next couple years. Surprisingly, only four of the 16  are sequels. In a time when it seems every other “new” movie is a sequel or reboot, that number is quite pleasing.

There are a few comedies, a honey-loving bear, a deadly virus, and plenty more hitting theaters between now and 2013. The next three years are full of some epic comic book adaptations and summer blockbusters. But not every film is geared for the geeks and fanboys.

For a quick rundown of the new release dates, here they are in list form. Below that, you’ll find more descriptive breakdowns of each.

Upcoming Movie Release Dates

The first weekend of 2011 presents quite the thriller. Unknown White Male stars Liam Neeson as a man who awakens from a coma and quickly discovers his identity has been stolen. But this is not just any case of identity theft. Nobody, not even his wife, believes him until a young woman helps his search. The film co-stars Diane Kruger and January Jones, along with Frank Langella. Unknown White Male releases January 7, 2011.

Anthony Hopkins will close out the first month of 2011 by teaching an up-and-coming priest a thing or two about exorcisms. The Rite, which releases January 28th, 2011, adapts the Matt Baglio novel of the same title. Apparently, the story is the true tale of a “disillusioned American seminary student who attends exorcism school at the Vatican and ultimately finds his faith through encounters with demonic forces.” Sounds interesting enough, but a late January release date casts a shadow on its potential.

Anthony Hopkins Exorcist The Rite

The Farrelly Brothers are still looking for their next comedy hit. It’s been a long three years since The Heartbreak Kid, but the directors will hop back on the saddle with Hall Pass on February 25, 2011. The film has some mid-level star power in Owen Wilson, Jenna Fischer, Alyssa Milano, Christina Applegate, Jason Sudeikis and Richard Jenkins. The story follows a married man given an open invitation by his own wife to have an affair.

In March of 2010, Diary of a Wimpy Kid came out of nowhere with the intention of kick-starting a new film series based on a novel. While it quadrupled its $15 million production budget, the buzz was not as widespread as 20th Century Fox hoped. Regardless, the studio has given Diary of a Wimpy Kid 2: Rodrick Rules a March 25, 2011 release date. The fifth novel by Jeff Kinney will be released this year, but the studio may catch up quickly if they continue to release one each year.

The Girl with the Red Riding Hood has been handed an April 22, 2011 release date. Twilight director Catherine Hardwicke will guide Amanda Seyfried through the woods in this adaptation of the classic tale. If the director’s history doesn’t worry you, the premise sure might. Orphan screenwriter David Johnson has written a script where the wandering girl gets caught in a love triangle amidst her other infamous problems.

Catherine Hardwicke - Red Riding Hood

If you’ve been desperately awaiting a Winnie the Pooh adaptation, Disney has given you a date to save. A mid-summer release on July 15th, 2011 will give the animated bear and his friends to a theatrical makeover. Renowned voice actor Jim Cummings (330 titles in 25 years) will voice both Pooh and Tigger, Peter Cullen (the voice of Optimus Prime in Transformers) will perform Eeyore and Craig Ferguson will voice the Owl.

Also releasing July 15th, 2011, The Sitter will put Jonah Hill in the middle of a babysitting adventure he’ll never forget. In an argument for typecasting, Hill has been cast as a suspended college student. The film is rumored as a mix between Adventures in Babysitting and Superbad.

Four Christmases director Seth Gordon will lead an A-list cast in the July 25th, 2011 comedy Horrible Bosses. Jennifer Aniston, Colin Farrell, Jason Bateman, Jamie Foxx and Charlie Day make up the cast of New Line’s hopeful summer hit. The plot reads, “Three friends conspire to murder their awful bosses when they realize they are standing in the way of their happiness. If anything makes the film a worthy watch it is the presence of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia’s Charlie Day.

Horrible Bosses cast

Although still in the script phase, Late Bloomer now has an August 12, 2011 release date. The film adapts Ken Baker’s novel Made: A Memoir and tells “the story of an adult male who, after the successful removal of a benign tumor resting his pituitary gland, experiences all the changes and effects of puberty over a three-week period.”

In mid-March, Warner Bros. announced the intent to make Final Destination 5, much to the dismay of movie fans. A once great concept has been dragged along the road far too long and the studio is hoping a 3D sequel will change that. The fifth installment continues to make progress with an announced release date of August 26th, 2011.

Dark Castle Entertainment has given The Apparition a September 9th, 2011 release date. It sounds a bit like a combination of the studio’s own upcoming film Splice and the indie hit Paranormal Activity. The synopsis says The Apparition is about “a couple haunted by a supernatural presence that is unleashed during a college experiment.”

Say what you will about Brendan Fraser’s acting career, but he’s still got a franchise or two up his sleeve. The actor returns in 3D on September 23rd, 2011 with Journey to the Center of the Earth 2. The world has only itself to blame after a nearly $250 million box office for Journey to the Center of the Earth.

One of my most anticipated films of next year is Steven Soderbergh’s Contagion. Now, with an official release date of October 21st, 2001, it sits in prime position for Oscar buzz. Talented writer Scott Z. Burns penned the script that will star Marion Cotillard, Matt Damon, Jude Law, Kate Winslet, Laurence Fishburne and Gwenyth Paltrow. The story explores the results of an international viral outbreak and the hysteria caused by mass media.

Contagion cast with Soderbergh

Valentine’s Day made half of its domestic box office on opening weekend, proving its gimmicky Valentine’s Day weekend release date to be a decent idea. The studio is attempting to recreate the relative success of the holiday ensemble piece with New Year’s Eve. The only difference is this “sequel” will release December 9th, 2011. The story structure remains the same, but the cast is still in the assembly phase.

20th Century Fox will release Cameron Crowe’s next project, We Bought A Zoo, on December 23rd, 2011. Production should begin this fall. 27 Dresses and The Devils Wears Prada writer Aline Brosh McKenna is penning the script. I’m not sure the connection between Crowe and McKenna, but it is safe to trust a filmmaker like Crowe.

Further down the road, Disney has announced Reboot Ralph will hit theaters March 22, 2013.  The film is apparently an animated adventure through the world of a video game. It was previously known as Joe Jump.

A scene from Journey to Center of the Earth 3D

Is that enough release dates for you? There’s plenty to add to your movie schedule, but not quite as entertaining a list as the next two summers. Still, movies are what we here at Screen Rant live for, so no complaints.

As usual, stay tuned for the latest movie news and release date updates. We’ll keep your movie ears burning.

Source: /Film and IMDb

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